Bailout - Perry Noble

I was sick all day yesterday and missed all our services. Fortunately, several churches have online campuses and I was able to really enjoy church online. Well, about as good as you can enjoy an online service while dealing with stomach issues and flu-like symptoms (eww).

I logged onto NewSpring's online campus and watched Perry Noble speak. NewSpring is currently in a series called "Bailout." I'm including my notes here from the message (or what some would call "Perryisms.")

  • “I think pro wrestling is real.” (yea! take that you haters!)
  • "We feel like the economy has put us in a submission hold."
  • “We’re taking our eyes off of Jesus and putting them on the economy.”
  • “God has not lost one ounce of sleep about where the stock market is.”
  • “Our 401k has turned into a 201k.”
  • “I’m about to mess with your god.”
  • "What I'm teaching requires discipline."
  • “We don’t like discipline. We want it now.”
  • “A bailout will occur when our bondage to bling is broken.”
  • Ask yourself, "What does Jesus expect?"
  • “Are your lips and your lifestyle matched up?”
  • Jesus didn't say "if" in this passage, he said "when" you give... (Matthew 6)
  • He [Jesus] spoke over 2,000 times about money, 500 times about prayer.
  • “I hate working abs about as much as I hate cats.”
  • “If you need to meet with me to give your gift, you just need to sit on it for a while.”
  • "Sometimes people strip the bride of Christ of her wedding dress and put lingerie on her."
  • "You won't find names on chairs here at NewSpring. This is God's church."
  • “Christians should be the most generous people on the planet.”
  • “You all are listening way too slow. Stay with me.”
  • “God’s B.S. meter works so well.”
  • “The two biggest problems in this country are consumer debt and obesity. It’s not because we don’t have enough. It’s because we don’t manage what we have well.”
  • “Your heart always follows your money.”
  • Ask yourself: "Where is your heart?"
  • “This church is going to survive without your money. If you don’t believe me, give to another church.”
  • “Don't count on your inheritance. Your grandma has already spent your inheritance. She bought a Buick.”
  • “In Kenya, I watched people who have nothing give.”
  • "Lets not lie and say Jesus has our heart when he doesn't have our treasure."
  • Ask yourself: "Who do I serve?"
  • "Satan is bad all the time, all the time Satan is bad" - Craig Groeschel
  • "They key to overcoming our money problem is winning the battle with our eyes."
  • "Money is the primary competitor of our hearts."
  • “What do you need to do to put Jesus first in your life?”
  • "God doesn't want to be in our top 5. He wants to be number 1."

  • ...and if you scrolled to the end of this post because you didn't want to read my notes, here is the message in 46 seconds.

    RSS Subscribers: There is video here.

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